And life keeps moving on...

I cannot believe that it's November already! Life is flying by but I'm loving everyday of it. I'm enjoying this season of my life and attempting to balance that with planning for the future. I still have moments when I forget how close graduation is. I have so many options and there are so many unknowns, I'm learning to trust God more and more with the little things and big things. As for this upcoming summer, I really want to go to Africa. I've emailed and called the GJV office to talk to someone about my application but no one has gotten back with me yet. If that doesn't pan out, I will definitely go to Haiti! Whatever happens, I am trusting that God knows me better than I do, and that all of the promises He's made to me and over me will come to pass! He is faithful and so true and I choose to live like I believe that with everything I am. It's hard sometimes to not feel completely overwhelmed and crazy when I think about everything that I need to do and everything that will change. I just need to continually fill my mind and surround myself with His promises and His word. I'm definitely excited to see where God leads!!! :)

Soo many decisions...

I'm graduating in April! That's only a few months away and I'm getting anxious about what my life will look like after college. Will I stay in Jacksonville? Go straight to grad school? Get into the GJV program and go to Africa? Will I even me able to find a social work job or will I be stuck at Publix forever? If I do go to grad school, what should I study? What about student loans? Will I even get a respectable score on the GRE? Will I eventually drive myself crazy with all these questions? :)

At this stage in my life, I'm learning how to trust God's leading and His timing. I have lots of ideas about stuff I want to do but I'm not sure what the best path is to get there. I don't want to stay here out of fear and I don't want to move away just because that's the thing to do after college. I don't want to do anything out of fear and I don't want to do anything out of complacency. I don't want to do anything just to do it. I want to have a life of purpose. So far, my that purpose, besides serving Jesus, has been school. I've been a student-in that transitional stage of semi-adulthood. Now that I can see life after school, it's exciting but really scary. Yes, I know, I can be anything I want to be, but that's a lot of options. Sometimes too many options can feel as suffocating as too few options. Don't get me wrong, I would prefer too many over too few, but I'm still stuck on what to do.

My heart is pulled in so many directions-poverty, human trafficking, hunger, slavery, children, teenage mothers, domestic violence victims...I know God will lead me and guide me, I just wish I knew more of what he was doing :)

I mailed my application to go to Africa two weeks ago, I really, really, really, really, really hope and pray that I get in!!!

How are we living?

"Love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 19:19

This verse has been wrecking me lately. It's a verse I've heard countless times but this past week, it's been seriously on my heart.

Whenever I can't get something off my mind/heart, especially scripture, I start to pray about it hardcore. This blog is basically what I heard Jesus saying to me :)

This verse is so fundamental, so basic, but do any of His followers actually do it? If we really believe that Jesus has truly called us to the ends of the earth, the neighbor Matthew 19:19 talks about includes every other person on the planet. What a huge number of people to extend the love of Christ to! What an awesome privilege it is to join in the redemptive work begun by our Father God, what an amazing responsibility we have as His children.

Can we honestly say that our life is more important than the lives of the 6 billion other people on the planet? As people who claim to follow Jesus, we would never openly admit that, but do our actions say otherwise? Right now, there are millions of people around the world who are suffering and crying out for help. Psalm 34:18 says that God is near to the brokenhearted. He hears their cries. As people who claim to follow Jesus, shouldn't we pay attention to their cries too? Shouldn't we act on their behalf?

If I was an orphan, I would want someone to take me in. If I was in slavery, I would want to be set free. If I was sick, I would want medicine to make me well. If I was hungry, I would want food. If I was cold, I would want clothes. If I was lonely, I would want someone to visit me.

All around us, there are people who are crying out for all those things and more. God has called His people to love them. He's called us not only to love them but He has called us to love them like we love ourselves. That's a lot of love to extend and it's the kind of love that requires action on behalf of those who are hurting.

There is so much work to do. In Luke 10, Jesus says that "the harvest is plentiful but the laborers are few." We, as followers of Jesus, need to rise up and get started on the work that He has called us to.

Entering my 3rd decade of life...

I turned 20 last week. It's almost surreal. I feel old but really young at the same time...yay craziness :)

So I'm graduating in May, only a few months away! My grad school plans are all up in the air and I'm just seeking God right now to know what to next. As far as next summer goes, I think I found out what I want to do. I was randomly on the UMC website and found an amazing missions program! I'd be going to a country, probably in Africa, for 6-8 weeks and work as a global justice volunteer. It's a really cool program and it's only $2,200! Lately I've been feeling a real pull towards mission work, but I'm not sure if it's supposed to be in this country or abroad. I'm trusting that God will show me the steps to take and when to take them in His timing.

As far as grad school goes, I'm pretty sure I want to go the social work route and get my MSW. I think it's the best option to do all the things I could see myself doing. So for now I'm studying for the GRE and working on my application to be a Global Justice Volunteer. I'm excited to see where God leads :)

I never have good ideas for these titles...:)

I'm really bad about this whole blogging thing :)

So this summer has been interesting.

I know that I'm in a time of preparation for the things God wants to do in my life. Lately, he's been speaking to me about my future, grad school, etc and I'm trying not to get too caught up with the future. Though I know there will be huge changes coming in about a year, there are changes that are happening now. There are changes and frustrations and preparation that I have to deal with now. It's can get overwhelming and scary. I'm being stretched and pulled and, in certain ways, tested in almost every area of my life. These past few weeks I've really had to seek God and his guidance on just how to get through the day glorifying him. I guess that's what I'm trying to figure out-the best way to bring glory to Jesus.

My life basically now is working at Publix and lately it's been pretty frustrating and annoying and all the other negative adjectives possible. I'm needing to discern whether this is because it could be time for me to move on or if it's just one of those times where I need to suck it up and deal with it. A lot of the time I'm at work and I feel like I should be doing something more productive for the Kingdom but other times I feel like being there is a way God has me being about his business...ahhh. I just need guidance and peace about a lot of things in my life right now.

If anyone actually reads this, would you pray for me? Thanks.

Yay Summer!

This summer has been super full so far! I've been working lots and lots, which is great for my bank account (and my Amsterdam payments!), but it does get tiring. In between working 30 hours a week, Access stuff, volunteering at the food pantry plus hanging out with my family, I'm becoming more exhausted then I was during school! But it's all good...I'm having fun and making money :) I'm so excited about what the future holds and all God is doing in my life and in the lives of people around me! Yay!!! :)

Drawn to the Broken

"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and He saves the crushed in spirit."
Psalm 34:18

If God is with the broken, I think that's where I should be too. This verse has been heavy on my heart the past few weeks and it's been challenging me like crazy. I've been praying to have the eyes to see the broken and the hurting people around me and God has definitely answered that prayer. It's been a very stretching two weeks, for sure. Being near the broken and seeing their pain is really difficult for me. My heart aches for them and I have to fight the urge to walk away. I'm becoming okay with crying over their hurt...I think God's okay with me mourning with those who mourn and weeping with those who weep. After I mourn for what they've been through, I have to learn to stand with them and help them walk through the healing process. The process of healing is painful. Allowing God to go to those deep places that have been hidden and covered up with a smile for so long isn't exactly my idea of fun. This type of pain is worth it though; it's the fruitful kind, the kind that leads to healing and freedom and restoration. My heart longs for the people God has put in my path to begin to live in that healing He so longs to give. God isn't near the broken to just be there, He is there to bring healing and hope. I want God to fill me up so much that He overflows from me, that His words of healing will flow from my mouth and that His love with surround everyone I encounter. My prayer is that healing and hope will spring up among the broken. Just like the valley of dry bones in Ezekiel, I pray that the dead will come to life, that those who are in bondage to their past will break free and begin to live a life of freedom. I know my God is more than able, but His people must be ready to stand in the gap and intercede for the broken. They must be ready to encounter the pain and point them to the Father with words of hope and love.